Horror isn’t just a genre; it’s an amalgamation of pop culture, cozy traditions, and things that go bump in the night. This year, we're taking our 31 Days of Horror across the entire cultural spectrum. We’ll be taking a look at movies that scare us, games that kept us paranoid, scary books we cozy up with under blankets, music that sets that spooky tone and seasonal food we’re craving–or strange food you’d have to tie us up and force feed us. Whether you’re looking for something truly terrifying or a cozy autumn haunt, come back every day this month for a new bite-sized review or spooky adjacent list. Ok, so this is a weird one I know, but bare with me. Viy is a Soviet era gothic horror that is as surreal and liminal as you can get. A trio of seminary students get lost in the countryside and one of them, Khoma, becomes the target of witch. The film follows the student as he escapes the clutches of the witch (who shape shifts between an old hag and a young woman) , seemingly kills her, and is then tasked with praying over her body for 3 days. Seems simple enough, but this is a spooky movie baby! Those three days are filled with some of the craziest imagery you'll ever see. While the film was made in the 60s, so much of it feels uniquely modern. The visual effects are wonderfully odd and well done, really sucking you into the madness this dead, dying, tricking witch subjects Khoma to. Wild composite shots that look as clean and realistic as possible, disgusting hellish creatures, and just plain old kooky insanity. There isn't much plot to grab on to beyond that, so if logical progression or complex story is what you're after this one may not be for you. But if you want beautiful thrill ride that feels like a stage play gone awry, then this might be your bag. It runs just shy of 80 minutes and is pure madness, soviet style. Get your mind in the right place and jump into the Viy madness! The film is avialable to stream plenty of places for free on Tubi, YouTube and more on Just Watch

Horror isn’t just a genre; it’s an amalgamation of pop culture, cozy traditions, and things that go bump in the night. So this year, we're taking our 31 Days of Horror across the entire cultural spectrum. We aren't just talking about movies—we're talking about the video games that kept us up till 3 AM, the books that gave us chills, the music that sets the perfect eerie vibe, and the seasonal food we're craving—or the strange food you’d have to tie us up and force feed us. Whether you're looking for absolute terror or just a cozy autumn mash-up, come back every day this month for a new bite-sized review or spooky adjacent list. At some point, David Cronenberg took a weird left turn with his directing. That's saying something for the man whose name is synonymous with body horror and surrealistic imagery. However strange and gross his films got, there was a balance in his early films, particularly when it came to the acting. There was a very, for lack of a better word, mainstream acting style throughout his films with small dalliances into much stranger, maybe stiffer, choices. That balance seemingly when out the window around this film, Existenz. Existenz centers around Allegra Geller (Jennifer Jason Lea), a video game developer embarking on a new release that promises to be a singular immersive experience. During a demonstration of the game an assassination attempt by anti-video game extremists causes damage to her game console, which just so happens to be an organic based machine, sending Allegra and one of the event security guards Ted Pikul (Jude Law) on the run in search of sanctuary. Right off the bat, the film is not a satire. Existenz is riffing on ideas of video games =bad, like how they take over peoples lives, desensitization of people via video game violence, and toxic fandom well before these themes became well worn territory. But instead of harping on these ideas, it's more concerned with being a disorienting rollercoaster of blood and guts. All the best Cronenberg trademarks are all here! Gross organic guns, disgusting insect like monstrosities, a complete dissolve between what's real and what's not, and lets not for get the guns made of bones! Oh, did I mention that already? Well they're there and they are fucked up! (seriously though Cronenberg loves his biological weapons) The film came out in 1999, a major year in film history. Had Existenz come out later it would be seen as inspired by The Matrix, another film that plays with reality. Had it come out early it would have been ahead of its time, setting the stage for the Wachowski's film. Instead it came out a couple weeks after The Matrix, overshadowed by it completely. Which is a shame, but honestly I don;'t think there exists a reality where Existenz gets the credit it deserves. Back to my thoughts on the acting, everyone in Existenz feels like they're NPCs, which I guess is kinda the point. But that can be off putting to people who aren't used to stylistic choices that can be alienating. However as a fan of directors Yorgos Lanthimos and Wes Anderson, whose acting directions is often well beyond the "realistic" edge people are comfortable with nowadays, Existenz feels like another weird slice of outlandish presentation. Head over to Just Watch to see where this fantastic mind fuck of a movie is streaming! Vinegar Syndrome recently released a 4K copy of it, but it is insanely OOP . Off to eBay i suppose (don't actually do that).

Horror isn’t just a genre; it’s an amalgamation of pop culture, cozy traditions, and things that go bump in the night. This year, we're taking our 31 Days of Horror across the entire cultural spectrum. We’ll be taking a look at movies that scare us, games that kept us paranoid, scary books we cozy up with under blankets, music that sets that spooky tone and seasonal food we’re craving–or strange food you’d have to tie us up and force feed us. Whether you’re looking for something truly terrifying or a cozy autumn haunt, come back every day this month for a new bite-sized review or spooky adjacent list. When I first saw Ready or Not, I was completely entranced by its completely absurd brand of horror comedy that follows Samara Weaving as Grace, a young woman on her wedding day as she married into the wealthy Le Domas family. Once the night comes she must play a traditional family game that surprisingly turns into a The Most Dangerous Game riff full of spoilery stuff I won't go into just yet. So, yeah fun!! Ready or Not is downright goofy at times, but maintains it's overarching tone so well throughout. A character may deliver their line in the most over the top campy way but the Radio Silence, the production team behind the film, grounds it with a fantastic dark cinematography and level headed direction. That's pretty much directors y Matt Bettinelli-Olpin and Tyler Gillett entire MO: make the audience laugh at horrific shit happening on screen. Ready Or Not is filled with plenty of interesting set pieces for fans of very bloody and fun deaths, but never crosses the line into blatantly absurd...til the end where all your shreds of realism you may have had (which you shouldn't have given the insane beating certain characters take) is thrown out the window in wonderful fashion. What makes the film stand tall is that it never eschews the heart of the story: Grace and her resilience. Attempted kill after attempted kill, she mages to weave (pun intended) in and out of every scenario and her magnificent wail will be lauded with the best horror final girls. Go watch it now before I dig into it's sequel later this month! You can see where Ready or Not is streaming over at JustWatch or pick up a physical copy at your preferred retailer (or where you can find it since its kinda hard to find for a reasonable price)

Alright: I'm gonna say something controversial. I don't love hating on things. In fact, I think if you're a good reviewer/critic/journalist, you should be able, most of the time, to find the good in something. I also don't like to yuck someone's yum. Art is objective. Things I hate you might like. After all, a lot of people in Britain don't get peanut butter and jelly. While I think it's insane they'd think the combination would be overly sweet and gross, they think it's insane it wouldn't be. And honestly? For some it might be. I like almost every vegetable and I just don't really get into sweet potatoes. But I'm trying. Sweet potato fries? West African Ground Nut Stew? Two things I really like that feature your friend and maybe mine, the yam. Anyway, this took a rather foodish turn when I didn't mean it to. The point of Hate Watch isn't to watch something TO hate it, it's to examine the reasons why I thought I'd hate it and see if they hold true. I envision this as a sort of "try a thing for a little bit and THEN you can say you hate it or not." And I figure most of the time, I'll end up at least seeing what other people see. And I'm starting with Dancing With the Stars. That's the controversial part, because so many people adore this show. 6.67 million for this season's premiere. That's Friends numbers, friends. To start us off on this journey, here's my limited experience with the show: My mom and grandma loved it, and sometimes I'd sit in the same room and watch a little bit with them. Some seasons, some parts. Mostly not though. So why was I hating? 10 Things (I Think) I Hate About Dancing With The Stars: Shitty covers - Listen, I get the need for covers. I can appreciate the talent of the band. However...I really, really hated the covers in early years. The stars - I don't hate the actual stars, mind you. I just prefer a competition be among people in the field. We'll get to that more later in this list Cheesy hosts - Stupid puns, I love. Sometimes. Cheesy hosts, I tolerate. Less times. Boomer coded - Why have I always felt like this show was not for me? I'm not sure. It's just felt boomer coded the whole time, and I can't exactly put my finger on why I felt that way. Dancing as sport / lack of diverse genres - I love ballroom as much as the next person, but I also love ballet, hip-hop, tap, and a host of other genres. We don't really get that here. And I know, it's not the point, but the point is, I wish it was. Character judges - Ok, lots of shows have that one judge with the catchphrase or the stupid gesture (or all of the above) that's practically a pre-packaged cringe meme, but DWTS? I feel like they're aiming for it. Cheese. So much cheese. Ugh. Yes, ballroom is glitter and glamour and yes, these are celebrities and this is primetime TV for all ages, but holy cheeseballs, Batman. The fall of Alfonso Ribiero. I think they've done him dirty in both this host role and the one on AFV. He could be so much funnier and more personable without the scripted one-liners. Feeling old - either because I don't know who TF some of these people are or because I really do. Or because there's a 90s theme, but it's not a 90s theme, it's "music from the year you were born" theme and MOST OF THEM WERE BORN IN THE 90s." I'm so sorry, pass the Geritol. My parents like it. I am petty. Popularity contest potential : AKA America votes. I don't like that. Cuz it has nothing to do with skill and everything to do with popularity. Unless it doesn't. I have to trust the whole nation for that one though and I have trust issues. So You Think You Can Dance was so much better. There. I said it - But hear me out. Diverse genres. Expert Judges (Ok, Mary Murphy was the meme/character judge but she knew of what she spoke.) Everyone had to dance outside their genre. They were all actually dancers. Was that 10? Oh wow. It's actually 12. It was almost 13 Reasons Why in here. What’s Not Fair: I haven’t actually watched a single season all the way through, and I certainly pretended to watch a season or two with my mom and grandma and scrolled instead. Most of what I hate is assumptions that are based on passing observations and checking in and out of a show that was on in a room whose TV I didn’t control or a YouTube video I was watching. What I’m Gonna Do About It: I’m going to watch the whole damn season. It’s on streaming, so I don’t have to DVR it or be on my couch at a certain time. I have no excuse. Then What: Is it a redemption story or was I right all along? I guess we all find out at the same time. Here’s the thing. I think Bruno isn’t a personality hire. I think he knows a lot more about all the things than the edits imply he does. Kinda like Mary Murphy on SYTYCD or Paula Abdul on American Idol. All actually brilliant, all reduced to memes and catchphrases or oversized gestures. Also - we’ve got Giada De Laurentis and Julia Stiles, and I already missed Danielle Fishel last year. I just…I gotta see if she gets into Julliard. (Yes, I know. She didn’t even go there.)

Now, we could go back and cover the premiere but a premiere is a premiere and to be honest, I hate two night premieres. I hated them with SYTYCD and I hate them with this. Mostly because it’s a lot of filler for a format that’s already got that in spades. On to the first actual week of the competition, after meeting everyone and eliminating Conner Leavitt and Sarah Jane Nader, who I didn’t know before and had not yet formed an attachment to, though it is a bummer that the same-sex pairing was only there for the premiere. Now that we’re in the meat of things, let’s separate the critique into two categories, Hates and Greats. It’s what it sounds like. I’ll list what I’m liking and what I’m still not jiving with. (That is, in fact, a dance joke.) Let’s go! Hates: I do not enjoy Julianne Hough in this role. I also think the wardrobe they choose for her is odd. She feels like a placeholder, and I don’t think that’s on her as a person, but she definitely isn’t winning me over, we’ll put it that way. Vague Themes: I had to look up what viral hits night actually implied. Like, I get the concept of a viral hit, but was this a nod to something each star went viral for, a viral moment on the show, or….something else? Turns out it was something else - though actually kind of all of the above. According to my research, it’s just a nod to trending audio, dance moves, etc. Ok then. As much as I’m a doomscroller I only caught a few of the references. Maybe I am getting old. Host banter: I can appreciate that ballroom is over the top glitz and glamour. In a world covered in sequins and fringe, it’s easy to get a little crazy with it. But the WRITING FOR THE HOSTS. I just wish they’d lay off the cheese even a little bit. Filler: There’s lots of it. I appreciate getting behind the scenes a little bit, but sometimes I feel like it gets to be a little too much. Caricatures: He plays baseball, guys. She’s Italian! I mean, we know who these people are, or they wouldn’t be Stars, right? (Ostensibly, because see above, I am old, and don’t know who everyone is). Still, I feel like we fall back on the big picture of these folks a lot instead of just letting them be people learning dance. Greats: Realistic performances: I mean, the performances are real, but because of some of the hype around the show, I always felt like people were raving about how amaaaazing everyone was right out of the gates. Truth is, for the most part, they’re not. And that’s cool, because it makes you root for them week by week and it really makes it more exciting when they do level up. Levelling up: To expand on that last part - seeing people improve is actually a lot of fun. While I really enjoyed shows like So You Think You Can Dance because everyone was already dancers, it’s nice to see people push beyond their boundaries. Some of these folks really, really never did anything close to ballroom and it shows, but they’re (for the most part) improving. Sorry, Giada. Interesting Special Skills: It’s also kinda fun to see the “stars” inject their personality into it in a non caricatured way - we’ve got models who are great at posing, athletes who can pull off power moves, and even funny folks who can inject humor and levity into what they’re doing. Real Reactions: For all the showbiz of the thing, I do really appreciate seeing the real reactions celebrities have to their performances, even if it’s a little sad sometimes when you know someone knows they didn’t do their best (Sorry again, Giada). These people are in the spotlight for something they DON’T necessarily excel at, and it’s interesting to see them grapple with that. It makes the highs higher and the lows lower. Reframes: I think Bruno is now my favorite judge, weird meme energy aside. His knowledge is obvious and he seems to judge really fairly. Flip side - I think Carrie Ann Inaba might be the easy judge, though I don’t think she’s too bad. Not sure how I feel about all the added content. I guess I’m not in deep enough to want an after party, behind the scenes, and full gamut of social media stuff that tie in. Well, there we go! On a scale of hatin’ to I’m lovin’ it, I’m neutral with a chance of enjoying it. Notable moments: I think Ezra Frech and Daniella Karagach killed it with their routine to “Low” which is a sentence I didn’t expect to ever be typing. The thing is though, they figured out how to work with Ezra’s prosthetic in the context of the dance and make him shine for his athleticism and the end result was a really, really great performance. While inclined not to love Jackson Olson because all the banana cheese, he’s growing on me because he’s so into it. I think he’s got a really good ballroom spirit, and he loves to be in the spotlight, and those are two things that lend themself to IRL ballroom goodness. We’ll see what happens for Yacht Rock Week. Yikes.

Screenshot: False Hero My first playthroughs of Demon’s Souls and Dark Souls were special experiences. I never quite knew what was waiting for me behind any given corner. The worlds in both of these games were enigmatic, compelling in a way I hadn't quite experienced in the medium before or since. I didn’t want to keep playing through those brutal challenges just to be a badass hero fighting for whatever the game’s version of “right” was. Instead, I fought through as blindly as my protagonist, trying to discover the nature of the world while entirely misunderstanding—or understanding too late—what “right” and “wrong” even meant. It wasn’t a scripted narrative trick like the twists in Planescape:Torment or Knights of the Old Republic. It was a slow realization born from discovering the truth of the world through my own hard-won battles. Dark Souls condensed discovery and knowledge into a video game, literally translating philosophy into world design and gameplay. False Hero, more than any other Souls game that came after it, has achieved that exact same feeling for me. Screenshot: False Hero False Hero is an action role-playing game. Stepping into this lineage, False Hero casts you as a mysterious figure who discovers a legendary mask—an artifact that allows you to steal enemies’ combat abilities. A spreading eldritch evil known as Death is corrupting the world–spreading literal death across the Kingdom of Wisdom. It’s the perfect bed of narrative ambiguity with the choice of the player to retain the status quo, or allow Death to have its way. Developed over the last 6 years by solo developer ‘Florian’ of Torchlight Games, he is behind the art, music, and game code–without the help of AI. An impressive feat for any game developer, but even more so considering the behemoth of an IP that Torchlight Games pitted themselves against: the Souls series. There have been many imitators that have come before, and those who pick and choose mechanics to create a more soulslike feeling. False Hero is not just a souls inspired game, it is a soulslike–though, like any good homage, developer Torchlight Games takes the formula and plays with it just enough to make it compelling, and unique. Screenshot: False Hero Some of the hallmarks of a soulslike are the risk reward nature. Rest at bonfires, enemies respawn, healing items replenish, etc. It’s all the same here, even down to dodging with i-frames. Bosses sit behind fog walls. And the entire world has a mysterious, dreamlike feeling that no soulslike has quite captured since Demon’s Souls–some of which was even missing in Bluepoint Games’ brilliant remaster. There are some notable differences: if you die, there’s no bloodstain waiting so you can retrieve your body. Instead, you just lose your accumulated upgrade points. These points also aren’t used to upgrade your character so you can manipulate their stats. You, instead, can choose to upgrade abilities and spells you collect from killing monsters. Abilities also replace traditional weapons. You start with a sword attack, and any other attack you gain is from defeating creatures and stealing their weapon arts. Screenshot: False Hero While a lot of games slap a player into a soulslike environment and call it “good enough” developer Torchlight Games has a great sense of what makes a soulslike game good. Enemy placement is difficult, but never feels overly unfair. Bosses are not only difficult, but they are often hinted at through audio, visual or environmental clues–something a lot of soulslike games don’t accomplish as aptly as is done here. Outwardly, False Hero’s biggest departure from the soulslike genre is its art style. Made with a “sort of” fifth generation low fidelity style, it looks like a game I could have played on my PlayStation growing up. This works heavily in the game’s favor. I argue that low res horror games are great because it forces the brain to fill in the blanks where fidelity comes short. I’m not saying that False Hero is a horror game, but it accomplishes a lot of the same effect here, also enhancing the game’s mysterious, dreamlike quality. Enemy design and environments are top notch. Just as the narrative forces you to piece together the truth of the world, the retro aesthetics force your imagination to fill in the visual gaps, deepening the overall sense of ambiguity Screenshot: False Hero False Hero isn’t perfect, as much as I wish it was. It suffers from controls that feel a tiny bit floatier and stiff compared to a true souls title–but only barely. I can tell a lot of work went into making the character’s hits and movement feel just right, and while it’s a game that is great to play, it never feels quite as mechanically satisfying as a Miyazaki directed game. There is also no multiplayer, so if you’re having trouble with a certain boss, all you can do is “git gud.” There are a lot of surprising options, however, like a gauntlet mode and a mode that allows you to fight bosses that you’ve already defeated. I’m going to be keeping an eye on anything Torchlight Games does in the future, because False Hero is a brilliant game. It’s easily in my top games of the year list, and made me feel that sense of wonder that Demon’s Souls and Dark Souls did all those years ago.

Horror isn’t just a genre; it’s an amalgamation of pop culture, cozy traditions, and things that go bump in the night. This year, we're taking our 31 Days of Horror across the entire cultural spectrum. We’ll be taking a look at movies that scare us, games that kept us paranoid, scary books we cozy up with under blankets, music that sets that spooky tone and seasonal food we’re craving–or strange food you’d have to tie us up and force feed us. Whether you’re looking for something truly terrifying or a cozy autumn haunt, come back every day this month for a new bite-sized review or spooky adjacent list. A Night in the Lonesome October isn't just recommended by us - it's also recommended by George R. R. Martin himself! As you might have gathered, during the spooky season we tend to go a little hard here at Culture Combine. I would personally argue that horror itself is an amalgamation of cultural elements and genres. It’s not so much a single category as an “I’ll know it when I see it” sort of thing. But not all horror is inherently terrifying, and there can even be some cozy traditions to be made beyond the usual pumpkin-spiced lattes and curling up under blankets to watch horror-themed baking shows. Roger Zelazny's A Night in the Lonesome October is not only a book that goes along with the season perfectly, it’s also a culture mash-up of its own—which, you know, goes perfectly with the whole “Culture Combine” thing. It features a cast of characters spanning across fiction and non-fiction, serving as a massive love letter to Gothic literature, Universal Monsters, and Hammer Horror films. What makes this novel extra special is how it plays out from day to day, with each chapter corresponding to a specific day of the month. If you read it daily (or nightly), you actually watch the story progress in real-time as the characters vie for control over a mysterious ritual that could lead to the end of the world. But if you’re looking for genuine terror, look elsewhere. Despite its apocalyptic stakes and cast of horror heavy-hitters, the book is surprisingly cozy. It’s full of charm and wit, most of which is delivered by the canine narrator named Snuff. While the famous masters plot and scheme, most of the real work is done by their familiars—animal companions that can talk to each other. These animals spy on one another, form alliances, trade secrets, and sometimes have their own agendas. It creates a brilliant mystery where you have to figure out not only who is who, but where their allegiances lie. A Night In the Lonesome October was Zelazny’s last book before his passing, serving as a bittersweet capstone to a career full of sci-fi standards and stand-outs. It’s one of my absolute favorite books, and a yearly tradition. A Night in the Lonesome October is available at online booksellers, and there’s even a fantastic audiobook version available on Audible.

Screenshot: Toem 2 Low-stakes picture puzzler and adventure game Toem is back with a sequel, Toem 2. Once again, you take control of the young photographer as you travel from location to location, meeting characters and accomplishing tasks. It’s more of the same, but it’s hard to complain when the result is so damn wholesome—and oddly satisfying. In Toem 2, you’ll be making the journey through an expanded world with brand new biomes to witness the Whirling Birch Bloom. While that familiar gameplay returns, there are a few added mechanics to change things up. You can now jump and climb in Toem 2, introducing new vertical challenges. The game's biggest hook for me wasn’t just its visual style, but how this new movement felt. While the new jumping puzzles require slightly more hand-eye coordination than the first game, they remain incredibly forgiving in true cozy game fashion. Moving around the world feels genuinely fun, and the platforming adds a refreshing layer to your traversal. Screenshot: Toem 2 Your main objectives often revolve around your camera, which can do much more this time around. While the controls remain familiar and intuitive for snapping great photos, the device now functions as a sort of multitool. You'll use it in wildly untraditional ways—like cutting or hammering—which opens up far more environmental interaction than the original game allowed. Of course, there are lots of little secrets to discover around every corner, and each of Toem’s characters is uniquely charming. Puzzles aren’t just fetch quests (though fetch quests certainly abound); they often require a little more creative thought. Tasks never feel like busywork, and the solutions can be surprising and gratifying. The Photo Challenge Guild even returns to add an extra layer of difficulty to the mix for each area you’ll travel through. Like its predecessor, Toem 2 highly encourages thorough exploration. While you don’t have to complete every quest in an area to move on, you’ll probably want to. After all, who wants to leave a startled bear without his jam, or refuse to help a worm control the growth of strange vines that make her sneeze? The sequel includes larger areas with different themes than the original, making for even more joy in discovery. Screenshot: Toem 2 The world is full of life and personality, even without being in full color. The hand-drawn style is unique, whimsical, and satisfying to play. This is further elevated by fantastic sound design that constantly reinforces a "you’re doing a good job!" feedback loop. From the little clicks and beeps that let you know you're on the right track, to the collectible soundtrack cassettes you can find along the way, the audio design shines. This is all in addition to the stamps you collect to access new areas and the new outfits hidden in gift boxes strewn about the world. Toem 2 is chock full of the charm of the original, with even more to do and see. It’s extremely rewarding to get to know the world around you and interact with everything you can through the familiar lens of your trusty camera. When you do, you’ll find that there’s a lot more magic in its world than simply making it to the end. Toem 2’s magic is in its simple, satisfying journey of breezy exploration. It’s pure joy. Toem 2 is out tomorrow on PC (Steam), PlayStation 5, and Nintendo Switch.

Alrighty friends. It's time for another edition of Tik Tok Tawk, where we dredge up some of the hottest topics to hit the 'Tok. Let's start a little lighthearted with one for the horse girls and guys among us. Yep, we're talking about Katie Van Slyke, whose life on the farm garners her 5.6 followers, and whose goat Bella, is so very, very pregnant. If you're not a regular of her page, Katie Van Slyke runs a farm called Running Springs, and has a host of animals. She's known for breeding horses, but also has mini horses, donkeys, goats, barn cats, dogs...you name it. If you're an animal lover and kinda always wanted to have a farm, this is the content you watch before bed to calm down. UNLESS one of the goats is as wide as she is tall, past due, and hasn't produced her babies yet. But hey, here's some good news. Since this edition went up late tonight, I can report that Bella had her babies. Unless you subscribe, you won't see til tomorrow, but at least you can rest easy that they're happy and healthy. Let's move on to something a little more on the nose for us as journalists : the press pool boycott of White House coverage in solidarity with CNN, Politico and MS NOW. PBS, CBS, ABC and NBC joined the boycott and, in a surprise twist, so did Fox News, who represents the chair of the press pool and put out a statement saying they would not cover "any event designated as pool coverage of the president." Since September 21, 2026, it's gotten a lot more dicey for Trump and his administration to be able to broadcast absolutely anything and have it get out there. Notably, and passing through the For You page of almost everyone, was a press event in which there was absolutely no audio without press pool mics there to capture it. Welp. We'll see what develops. And in case it wasn't obvious, though we in no way have access to a White House press pool, we absolutely stand with the journalists from CNN, Politico and MS NOW. Moving on: Coffee much? Most of us do, and a lot of us might consider it up there with doomscrolling as a bad habit. Caffeine is addictive, after all, and there's that headache you get when you missed a cup. Good news if you're a java monster like some of us though. According to the American Heart Association, the safe amount of coffee per day for adults is FIVE cups. That's a little crazy coming from a health organization but like, it's better news than poop lettuce. So yeah. Go get you some. (There are some extra things you should know, so check out the details first) I feel like that rounds out the tawk, but if we missed anything, hit the comments!

Screenshot: Seafarer: The Ship Sim I’m a bit of a sucker for simulation games. It allows me to put myself in the professional shoes of those whose jobs I’ll probably never have. I don’t think I’ll ever be a pilot, nor will I ever be a train conductor. I will definitely never be the captain of a large seafaring cargo ship. And while I appreciate games that really lean on the simulation aspect, I don’t mind the option to have some helpful tools that take the ease off the mechanics a bit through player assists and automations. On paper, Seafarer: The Ship Sim is exactly the type of sim I could sink hours into: exploring the wide open ocean, moving freight, and just enjoying the sea spray. Unfortunately, this ship sim is dead in the water. Seafarer: The Ship Sim (lest you confuse it with another “seafarer” i guess) is a ship simulation game played from a first person perspective. And what better way to have a sim than to have actual sea legs that allow you to walk around these large vessels. I was immediately excited at the possibilities that lay in front of me as I started up a campaign. There’s some strange dialogue, sure, but it’s not the first time I’ve played a game with what seems like AI generated or badly translated dialogue. But what really matters is how the actual simulation is, and that means developer Astragon Development really put some effort into making it the best ship simulation that they could make. Right? Guys? Sadly, the answer is that they did not. Screenshot: Seafarer: The Ship Sim Ship handling isn’t great. Since the entire game centers around ships and, you know, actually piloting those ships, having poor ship handling is a non-starter. Despite billing itself as a sim, and even touting Nvidia’s Waveworks water simulation technology, the ships in Seafarer don’t handle like large vessels. Though I think the Waterworks 2.0 technology that is employed mostly deals with how the water looks, rather than how ships handle in it. I’ve never crewed a large ship like this before, so I took to the Steam comments and reviews to see if I was off the mark. According to random internet users, my suspicions are confirmed: this game does not approximate the feeling of operating a large maritime vehicle. Which is a major bummer, and instantly makes the rest of the game feel like slop. Well, at least I can still walk around some massive ships and check them out in their detailed glory. But it turns out, ships are a bit empty and boring. The first person view really helps with the immersion, but despite these big ships having some attention to detail put into their creation, they’re still big mostly empty metal boxes with not much to do in them besides be immersed–which is about as exciting as it sounds. Screenshot: Seafarer: The Ship Sim I mean, there are entire rooms that exist with one or no interactable objects, and instead exist purely for flavor. I’m not opposed to that, but again, it needs to be balanced with fun and capable components to make it worthwhile. I mean, you can add all the flavor to garbage you want, and it still tastes bad. And there are only 8 vessels to explore, which doesn’t make the ship selection feel overly robust. It’s not like there’s a lack of available activities, though. You can load/unload cargo, as well as bring it to its destination. You can also do non-freight activities like engage in patrols, or even fight fires using on-ship water cannons–which is probably my favorite activity. It gives you immediate feedback, it doesn’t feel as tedious as loading/unloading does–and you get to use a giant water cannon. Screenshot: Seafarer: The Ship Sim There’s also a story campaign that involves uncovering dark secrets while performing many of the tasks in Seafarer across several campaign missions. My attempts to play through the campaign kept getting stalled on objectives that just wouldn’t complete, even after I changed to the 1.0 press review build. While I appreciate the effort, the hokey presentation and strange voice acting combined with the odd dialogue made continuing through the campaign burdensome. If you ever dreamed of crewing a ship with your friends, Seafarer does help make that a reality with its multiplayer component. Up to four players can play together simultaneously, which helps ease the burden of some of the tedious loading/unloading of cargo–tasks that should go to AI crewmates, but inexplicably don’t. Despite being given a key to test the multiplayer component, my coworkers and friends declined. Screenshot: Seafarer: The Ship Sim I would love more than anything to come in and say that the reviews have it all wrong. That the Steam Early Access reviewers don’t know what they’re talking about. But the “Mixed” average review score for the Early Access product tells a lot of what you need to know about the game itself. My friends were right to pass on crewing this vessel. When the most enjoyable part of a game is spraying a water cannon to break up the monotony of manual labor that the AI refuses to do, the simulation has failed. Seafarer: The Ship Sim might look good on paper, but out on the water, it sinks under the weight of its own unpolished ambition.

Screenshot: Train Sim World 7 Dovetail Games has released its latest Train Sim World, already onto the seventh iteration in the long running train sim series. If you’re not familiar with it (and how could you not be, at this point?) Train Sim World is basically a train playground. You are the conductor, and you can play with all sorts of trains–from steam locomotives to modern diesel giants. If you’d rather drive around an electric commuter train getting passengers to their stops on time, you can do that, too. Train Sim World 7 is about trains, it excels at what it sets out to do. Train Sim World 7 is the premier train sim game, without a doubt. It’s hard to outdo the sheer amount of fidelity and attention to detail that goes into each one of the trains. If you’re a diehard simulator fan, this is the type of game you want to gravitate towards. What is mean is: this is a “simulator” in the strict sense, not the goofy sense–though that trend has been reduced lately. But because of the level of detail, each train requires knowledge of that engine’s quirks, etc. For instance, starting an electric train by engaging its pantograph, charging brakes, etc. is a different experience from a diesel engine, or even a steam driven locomotive. I’m not a train expert, though I am a casual enthusiast. I have to admit that I’ve been stuck in a train more than once trying to figure out why having the brake off and the throttle up isn’t making the train go. Screenshot: Train Sim World 7 Luckily, if you’re a beginner (or a near beginner, like me) there are lots of options to help get that train moving forward. There is a training center that helps familiarize you with all sorts of trains and their operations–from passenger loading, to freight coupling. If you’re completely against wanting to learn how to operate a train–from putting in selector levels, charging batteries, etc–you can completely bypass this by turning on the Beginner Controls layout. This simplified layout doesn’t drive the train for you, but it simplifies operations by mapping throttle and brakes to controller triggers, allowing you to play Train SIm World 7 like an arcade racing game. And new to Train Sim World 7 are AI conductors that simplify passenger door operations to make those passenger transit routes as chill as you want them to be. What you decide to do in Train Sim World 7 is pretty much up to you. There are a lot of ways you can play. You can learn a real life route, and run it like a real conductor. You can stay freight oriented and use Train SIm World 7’s new freight hauler mode which tasks you with choosing the appropriate locomotive and delivering cargo at your own pace. Or you can get into the 24 hour simulation and navigating the challenges of keeping to a schedule while having to deal with passengers and freight traffic. There are quickplay options that help you hop into quick and short sessions, too, if you’re like me an just want to get in and touch some trains. Screenshot: Train Sim World 7 The thing I love about Train Sim World 7–and the series overall–is the immersiveness. I love that i can walk around my locomotive, walk through the passenger sections, open up cabinets to see what switches and panels are there. You can even just forgo the whole train conductor thing and just ride the rails as a passenger, letting your computer be your own portal into a slow TV style relaxing afternoon. Train Sim World is a long running series. I started playing Dovetail Games’ version of train simulations way back with (the still somewhat popular) Train Simulator Classic, which release way back in 2009. Dovetail games has kept up a decent cadence of game releases, especially when it comes to their Train Sim World series which started almost a decade ago–and has had almost yearly releases since. Screenshot: Train Sim World 7 Some people might be shocked to see that Train Sim World 7 has over four thousand dollars worth of DLC right out the gate. It’s not so crazy when you consider Train Sim World compatibility, and how DLC bought from a previous pack moves forward. That means any DLC that you might buy for Train SIm World 7 should transfer to next year’s Train Sim World 8. There are a few specific expectations to this related to earlier titles, but your DLC purchases are pretty future proof if you decide to stick with the franchise. I think that’s a pretty baller move on developer Dovetail Games’ part. Important to noe that this only works on the same platform, but it still makes sense from a consumer standpoint when you’re dealing with yearly releases. Now Train Sim World 7 might sound perfect, but it’s actually full of little frustrating quirks that have stuck with it since I last played an entry in the series way back in 2023. But Train Sim World 7 brings a list of new issues. The biggest complaint I have is the live weather system. I love that Train SIm World 7 has weather events, but the game can go from sunny to violently stormy in what seems like an instant. The AI conductors also seem to forget to do their jobs sometimes, leaving the player (who already might be unfamiliar with the games’ systems) having to troubleshoot what’s going wrong. If you wanted to play with trains, Train Sim World 7 is your best bet. There really isn’t anything comparable–at least not to the level of immersiveness and attention to detail that Dovetail Games puts into each of the locomotives. This is a game that relies pretty heavy on the “sim” part of the title, and even with its assists it’s a hard game for casual fans to get into. If you’re a Train Sim World 6 player and are wondering if you should move onto this year’s release, the weather system is a compelling reason–even if the weather does tend to change abruptly. Train Sim World 7 is available now.

Screenshot: IGS Classic Arcade Collection The IGS Polygame Master arcade system is perhaps not as well known as similar systems in the United States, with the closest probably being SNK’s Multi Video System known as the Neo Geo MVS, which made its way to the home market in a slightly different form as the NEO GEO Advanced Entertainment System, or the AES. I’m comparing the two because the IGS Polygame system was the Taiwanese answer to SNK’s single JAMMA board dominating arcades. If you’ve never heard of the IGS Polygame Master arcade system or any of the titles in this classic collection, that makes sense, since we didn’t really get many of these arcades out west. In fact, I don’t think I’ve ever run into one in real life. Galloping Ghost Arcade, one of the largest in the country, doesn’t even have a Polygame System, as far as I’m aware. Therefore, the IGS Classic Arcade collection is a rare opportunity to play these Taiwanese arcade games that you might not have ever heard of. Which makes sense, because a lot of these games were released around the time when games–and arcades especially–were transitioning to 3D graphics. Who wants to play a boring old 2D game? Well, it turns out modern audiences do, especially when they have great pixel art like a lot of MVS/AES games did. And while the IGS Polygame Arcade System technically has a bit more horsepower than what Neo Geo’s Pro Gear Spec could put out, it wasn’t a generational leap in graphical fidelity. So despite the IGC Polygame Master Arcade System boasting higher performance benchmarks than its SNK comptemporary, it only manages to provide more consistent frames than fancier graphics. Screenshot: IGS Classic Arcade Collection While I’m not an expert on the IGS Polygame System and its library, I would hope that the IGS Arcade Classics would be chock full of the best of what the system had to offer. If that’s true, then I don’t think I was missing out on much back in the day. I’m not saying the games are bad. They’re just good enough, with pixel art graphics that look second rate only compared to the best in the industry at the time, but still impressive to today’s standards. That said, if this is the cream of the crop regarding representation there is some serious lack in variety–and good titles. What you get in this bundle is 6 beat ‘em ups, 1 fighting game, and 1 run and gun game that is essentially a Metal Slug clone–and in my opinion the best reason to get the pack: Demon Front. I want to start with the good because I’m a game reviewer and a game historian at once, and these games definitely deserve to be seen and played by people. And Demon Front is a bit of a hidden gem. Calling it a Metal Slug clone isn’t incorrect nor an exaggeration. It shares a lot of elements of Metal Slug, but without the vehicles. It even has a similar graphical style–and it runs at a consistent high frame rate thanks to the (I’m assuming accurate) emulation of the IGS Polygame Master arcade system. I’ve never had a chance to play this game on original hardware, and while it is a bit underwhelming for a Metal Slug fan like myself it is definitely the strongest game in the bunch. Run, shoot, and use your companion to mitigate damage. Screenshot: IGS Classic Arcade Collection The second best game on the list is Martial Masters. It’s a fighter in the same vein as SNK fighters like the King of Fighters series with a four button layout. It’s a fast, very fluid fighting game that has an art style that looks a bit like Street Fighter III or a little bit like The Last Blade, but the latter could be attributed to the game’s Once Upon a Time in China-like theme. It’s an incredibly good fighting game, too. Which is rare when you come across one-offs that try to copy certain styles. And the pixel art is top notch, and could sit comfortably in with some of the best SNK and Capcom had to offer at the time. And then the rest of the games are beat ‘em ups. This is usually a genre that I’m fond of, but the only standout of the lot is The Gladiator. The Knights of Valor series is just okay, and is just another retelling of the Romance of the Three Kingdoms. While Oriental Legend and Oriental Legend Spooky are based on Journey to the West. I liked these games a little better than the Knights of Valor series, but that’s mostly because they didn’t take themselves so seriously in their character design. While the games themselves are good enough, and worthy of checking out for those who are retro game minded, the presentation of the series of games leaves a bit to be desired. Mistranslations abound as some options have to be figured out through context clues. There’s also some graphical issues I had on some games. While it doesn’t say it’s compatible with Steam Deck or Steam Machine, it also doesn’t run on either of these devices, which is too bad because retro games are great on those systems. The games do have local co-op, and the ability to be played online–though I didn’t get a chance to test any network capability. The lack of graphical options is also a bummer, with some basic CRT/scanline effect toggable, but not much else–not even the ability to remove the arcade border, which is something I usually prefer to do. Overall, IGS Classic Arcade Collection is great because it exists. I’m always an advocate to getting old games into a form that can be played by later generations. But I wish the presentation is a little bit better, and I fear that the titles are so niche and/or obscure that this pack won’t get much traction in the west, and therefore not likely to see much in the way of western centric updates. But it’s worth getting just to play Martial Masters and Demon Front, two very worthy arcade titles that have been obscure in the west.